


Teste Mustus Mundus Prologus

by BananaMilkLightning



Series: For the Goddess is Dead [2]
Category: Final Fantasy XIII Series, Lightning Returns: Final Fantasy XIII
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, For the Goddess is Dead AU, M/M, New World AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-19
Updated: 2018-07-24
Packaged: 2018-09-25 14:25:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9824453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BananaMilkLightning/pseuds/BananaMilkLightning
Summary: Even through the destruction of Nova Chrysalia the previous world has a lingering presence in the New World. Tales of a cracked moon in the sky and those entrapped by God's servants have yet to be told.For the Goddess is dead and those memories cannot be left to fade.[One shot collection]





	1. Prologus I

**Author's Note:**

> And so Noel witnessed the New World...

When Noel woke he felt as if his head was stuffed with cotton. The ceiling he opened his eyes to felt familiar but yet he couldn’t really place where he was. The sunlight wasn’t hindered curtains, illuminating the room in a soft orange glow. He sat up, one hand pushing away the thin duvet and looked around the room.

This is his room, he knows this. He knows there are photo frames and various souvenirs on the windowsill if he pushes the curtains away. He knows that if he were to open the bedroom door it would lead right into a hallway and on the right there would be a door leading to the bathroom. He knows that he lives on an island away from everyone he once knew.

That didn’t make sense. How could he know that he lives away from everyone when he doesn’t know who ‘everyone’ is?

Noel sighed and walked over to draw back the curtains. He frowned looking at the pictures adorned in simple frames. Picking up the furthest frame on his left he tried to place the memory of the event. Noel was in the centre, his arms slung around the shoulders of two other people. The boy on his right was grinning widely whilst pressing his head to Noel’s, while a girl on his left was suspended in laughter, eyes crinkled with delight.

‘Hope?’ He questioned.

Noel gasped as he dropped the frame, his hands shaking. Why did he say that? Who was Hope? He felt something bubble up in his throat and clenched his fists trying to get a grip of himself. Sliding down against the wall he fisted the fabric of his pyjamas, clutching his chest.

The strength of the sun seemed burn him rather than warm him it was suffocating and relentless. He remembers trying to keep potted plants in the house. Without fail the flowers always died even in his pursuit of trying to grow bellflowers. The blue ones were always the first to die. He remembers a friend asking him why he was so obsessed with them but he doesn’t remember his answer.

The second night he remembers everything, his old life in two different times, his new life on the island seized from the Almighty Bhunivelze and the achingly long lifetime spent in a world without time. It’s well into the night when he awakens, distraught as to why he had forgotten. Did he bury those memories away? Or had he convinced himself enough that he didn’t remember anything from his past life? Noel shifted in his bed trying to recall the events of the final days. He was in the New World. Everyone that had their soul collected by Lightning was here. Caius and Yeul wished to take Etro’s place in the Unseen Realm but that didn’t happen. Instead they were able to rest, they had found their salvation. The many Yeuls who wanted to live and the many who wanted to die are together with Caius in the Unseen Realm, at peace.

Noel sat up, letting out a shaky breath. Hope took their place, took Etro’s place. He remembered trying to grasp his hand, how small it looked, the way it didn’t hesitate. Hope never reached back. Serah and Lightning had taken hold of his hands then guiding him back to the group.

Noel decided Hope was stupid.

Noel dressed lightly and made his way down to the beach. It appeared that in his new life he still held a fondness for the sea, so much so that he owned a small boat and fishing equipment. He hummed to himself thinking about how Serah would scold him for even thinking about doing something so reckless. She didn’t know that even Snow had vaguely thought about it once upon a time.

Noel knew what he was going to do was selfish. Selfish for the sacrifice that Hope and others made so they could all live in this New World. He decided that Hope needs to be selfish and told him rightly so during a trip to Academia. Hope then had brushed him off, telling him he didn’t have time to be selfish any more. When he pushed further, Hope retold stories from the aftermath of his time as a L’Cie. Everyone around him had quickly disappeared and when he heard that Snow had gone off to find Lightning, Hope ran away from home to conduct his own search. His father had found him not long after, battered and bruised from fighting the inhabitants of Pulse without his L’Cie strength. He had made his father worry, the one person who had stuck by his side after he was released from stasis.

During that time the world didn’t need to be saved any longer. Lightning was gone but Snow was searching for her. Sazh was finally reunited with Dajh, and he was helping rebuild the world with his skills as a pilot. Even Serah who was worried about Lightning stayed in New Bodhum to teach the children there. NORA, along with Serah had created New Bodhum a place the people of Cocoon could call home. Vanille and Fang were trapped in crystal, they needed saving. His father, who was helping build a new life for everyone, needed him.

Noel had then asked if it was selfish to save everyone even if it meant you’d be killed in the process. Hope had responded with a swift, ‘there are something things in life you just do,’ and turned his head to sky.

He pulled the boat from its place in the sand dragging it towards the shore. Once he was close enough he counted to three and pushed the boat further into the water before wading in himself and boarding the boat. Noel began to paddle, maintaining a steady pace as he leaves the island behind. He deems himself to be out far enough when the lights emitting from the island appeared to turn into fuzzy blobs.

Placing down the paddle he perches himself on the edge of the boat looking down into the water.

‘It’s not a matter of can or can’t, right Hope?’

He dives.


	2. Find it Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes he wonders if the dreams really mean anything at all

'You were talking in your sleep.' Riku said, leaning on a hand.

'You've been doing it for a while actually.'

Noel scowled at him unable to give a comprehensible response. Springtime in a classroom that always faced the sun meant prime sleeping conditions. However, Noel’s morning before class nap was time and time again disturbed by his classmates. It made him wonder why he bothered to even try in the first place. In a school on an island everyone knew each other or as Sora’s nihilist twin would say “everyone knows of each other.”

Riku rolled his eyes continuing his pursuit.

'Who's Hope?'

The boy next to him stretched, draping himself over the desk. He had been having some weird dreams lately, but he wasn't going to admit that to Riku.

He let out a sigh and turned his head too look at him.

'That's none of your business,' mumbled Noel.

With raised eyebrows Riku looked at Noel and turned away facing the front.

'Fine don't tell me. It's not like Tidus will find out and then make up some dumb plan to try and get you to talk.'

Noel groaned into the desk. Tidus, self-proclaimed inventor of butz ball always had good intentions. Sometimes he went a little too far and ends up dragging other kids like Sora into his schemes. 'Recipes for disaster,' Reynn had called them. The worst was always when the disaster combo dragged Kairi into their fray.  No one could stop them, apart from the current head of the student council, Aqua.

He felt a hand pat on his shoulder and a reassuring voice.

'Seriously Riku, you have no tact.'

Trey, one of the smartest and most talkative in the class had arrived. He dragged a chair over to sit between Noel and Riku's desks.

'Noel, you'll always have my help when it comes to anything. After all my vast knowledge may be of help to your problem no matter how peculiar you may think-'

'No!' Noel yelled.

'I-I mean it's fine. Thanks.' He added.

Riku scoffed.

'So who is Hope?' Riku said.

Noel scrunched up his face in thought.

'A friend I think. I thought that I knew him when I was younger or something.'

'Well our memories from when we are really little are fuzzy.' Trey began. 'Have you tried asking your grandmother?'

'Yeah, but she said there was no kid called Hope... The only Hope where I live is a neighbour’s cat.'

'Hmmm...'

Riku turned his attention back to the front of the classroom.

'You should talk to Sora.' Riku said. 'You two might be- weird in that same way.'

Noel rolled his eyes turning to look at the sky.

'Sure.' He said.

‘Now, there really might be some use in asking Sora. He did manage to meet a long lost friend by using information from his dreams. Though…’ Trey brought a hand to his chin in thought.

‘The probability of it is far stranger. Makes me almost want to believe it’s not pure coincidence.’

‘Further investigation might prove it was not a coincidence. Their parents did keep in touch with each other, even if the two never met for a long period of time.’

‘Noel, you should continue your own investigation. I’m curious to know whether the result be the same as Sora.’

Noel snuck a glance a Riku who appeared to have tuned out Trey and was fiddling with a pencil on his desk.

‘Right.’ Noel said.

Trey made a noise of approval and returned his chair to its desk. He stood up announcing he'd be back in time for home-room. Noel guessed he was going to see whether there were any class notices. Trey did follow the duties of being the class representative with such enthusiasm no-one protested his re-election in the second term of school.

Noel sat up swivelling in his seat towards Riku and curled his hands into loose fists.

'You, really like Sora don't you?' Noel asked.

Riku was quick as ever. 'Yeah, he's my friend.'

'So if he suddenly moved you'd be sad rightl?'

'Yeah.'

Noel's eyebrows knitted in thought.

'What happened to Hope?' Riku asked.

'I think he moved away. Really far away.'

Riku didn't push the topic any further. It appeared to be a touchy subject for Noel he too had moved around a lot before settling on the island.

'You wanna find him?'

'I don't even know his last name or even if 'Hope' is his name. It's like he's Casper or something.'

Riku snorted at that, standing up from his seat.

'Talk to Sora. He may be kinda dumb but he's good at finding things and people.'

'Can you come with? I need a voice of reason.'

‘Van went to see Aqua.’ Riku said

Noel sprang up ignoring the smirk on Riku’s face.

‘We’ve still got time so let’s go!’

Riku hesitated by the door.

‘You know…I’d thought…you would rather talk to Claire about this kinda stuff.’

‘I would. I mean will, but you’re my friend too.’

Noel threaded his hand through the hair on the back of his head.

'Besides, you're here aren't you?' Noel said.

Riku grinned, opening the classroom door.

'I guess I am.' He said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For now see the new world and not pursue memories of the past.


	3. Starlight Mirage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Delusions in the heat haze even at night

** Starlight Mirage **

The humidity was too much. Noel fanned himself with his hand, cursing himself for not bringing an actual one. The heat haze of summer was upon them and the small island was subject to uncomfortably humid nights. He considered turning around, back down hiking trail. Further away from the abandoned house, his destination.

He picked at the t-shirt clinging to his body. Backing out now wouldn't do any good. Noel doubted there was anything scary about the building. No ghosts, spirits or monsters of any kind would await him there. Well maybe the monstrous forms of two older students drenched in fake blood and dressed in raggedy clothing will lurk nearby.

Noel wiped his hand on his shorts and wished he was back home. His chilled, air conditioned home. He had talked big to his friends and volunteered to go first. A decision Noel now regretted. The moonlit sky did nothing to ease the stifling heat of summer.

A glint of light in the corner of his eyes caused him to turn. There was nothing in the forest. He walked onwards. Ghosts aren't real after all. A fantasy.

Another glint of light whirled him in another direction.

'A torch?' Said Noel.

There was nothing in the forest and so he carried on.

Noel was closer to the abandoned house when it happened for the third time. Expect it didn't really feel like it happened mere minutes ago. It was familiar in the same way you find a lone sock in the corner of your drawer, the other half already long gone.

When his eyes caught sight of the light again, it didn't fade away or flash before his eyes, whisked away by some invisible force. He stared for long enough to see it was not just light, but the end of some sort of train. It’s all golds and silvers with tiny specks of bright white light.

Noel blinked. There was nothing there.

He walked closer to the house, moving up the steps to the front porch. He sighed.

'You can come out now.'

Noel waited for an answer, rustle of leaves or a shuffle of feet. He hears nothing at all. Noel looked around the house, cautious, expecting an ambush. He can't hear anything but himself.

He felt panic beginning its unforgiving creep. It seeped into movements, making them sharper, more harried. After turning and twisting looking for something, anything, he stood there with his back to the house. Sweaty palms gripped his t-shirt.

Noel felt his heart leap at the sight of the train. His breath hitched as he tried to ask who was there. He kept his eyes fixed on the train; it never disappeared when he blinked. He had a sudden delusion considering if ghosts really were real. Noel moved closer to the edge of the clearing. The train appeared to be partially hiding behind a tree. He walked further still and saw something else entirely, concealed by the bushes.

A hand.

It was paler than his own, paler than anyone he knew, paler than he thought humanly possible.

It too appeared to be radiating light, just as the train. Noel reached out to touch it. The hand twitched and by the next blink it and the train were gone. A pang of hurt caused him to clench his hands until fists. He didn't understand why.

Noel squeezed his eyes shut and counted to ten before opening them again. He surveyed the area, trying to find the train. There was nothing in the forest.

Noel exhaled loudly and glared into the forest. He wondered if the heat had finally turned his brain into mush and now he was seeing things. Ghosts, spirits and monsters weren't real, he told himself. He saw the light blaze again in the corner of his eye and turned fast to face the perpetrator, his mind made up that it was one his friends.

A figure adorned with a starlit cloak lifted a finger to their lips in a silent hush, told him otherwise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Could you call it anything but a ghost or spirit?


	4. There Deep Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just follow the humming, they said.

The main island always bustled with energy even on quiet days Noel could feel a soft hum. It didn't lead to anywhere in particular and Noel didn't know why he thought it should. One of the smaller islands Noel had tried to follow a current it took him all over the island and stretched far into the sea. It never built up, wavered or dissipated. It was strange.

He had asked a girl who loved to explore the islands and paint if she could feel it too. Namine seemed to understand well enough but couldn't feel it. She felt something different.

When he asked Riku the boy wondered if it was like being 'in tune with nature' or just really observant, to which he scoffed at and commented on how thick Noel could be.

His grandmother at first, said otherwise and warned him not to follow. He was later told it might be a sign from the gods and talked about fate. Noel wasn’t sure whether he believed her or not, it would be fun to believe it were true. At least then he could pretend he was a hero from one of his storybooks.

Noel sat on the edge of the platform, his legs dangling meters away from the water. Feet enclosed in strapped sandals swung back and forth as Noel pondered his current mystery. He gazed out towards the sea, watching the boats of various sizes glide along. Did that strange thing go past even the fishing boats further out in the sea?

He laid down, arms cushioning his head as he turned his attention to the sky. Did it stretch far up past the sky into space?

He inhaled the smell of sea and aged wood. Or deep down into the ground?

It didn't seem to do anything other than simply exist.

He felt the thumps of footsteps on the platform and craned his neck back to get a look. He came face to face with the sun and immediately rolled over to cover his eyes.

A hat was shoved onto his head and Noel peeked through his fingers to see the tall figure of Cid obscuring the sun, hair tousled by the breeze.

'Sunglasses?'

Noel scrunched his nose, fingers brushing over the straw hat.

'Don't like them. They make everything the same colour.'

Cid nodded and sat down next to him.

'What's on the agenda today?'

The boy swung his legs back and forth for a moment. 'I'm trying to solve a mystery.' He said, stretching his hand out.

'That thing I keep feeling. Like you got to go somewhere but you don't know why or where.'

'Have any leads?'

Noel shook his head. If he wanted to be honest he would tell him the recent heatwave was making his mind all groggy and sluggish. Although today was far better with the fresher air, courtesy of the wind.

Cid hummed in thought and brushed his fringe back.

‘Would you like to come with me? If you can’t find any answers here, they may be out there.’ He said pointing towards the glistening blue expanse.

Moments later Noel had found himself perched on a seat in the rowboat. His chin rested on the handle of an oar he was holding inside the boat. Cid sat across from him, eyes focused on the fishing rod he was preparing with a plastic critter. With two hands placed firm on the grip he took a swift swing. Noel watched the line soar through the air and land in the water, floater bobbing up and down.

Every time Cid took him fishing, Noel wanted to stick his head under the water and see what it looked it like to catch one.

One hand on his hat, Noel stared into the water. It turned a dark navy-blue blending into black deep down.

He blinked once and it was again, bright.

 ‘The water isn’t actually blue is it?’ He asked.

Cid shook his head.

‘No, not really.’ Cid points to the sky. ‘It’s because of the wavelengths of light. The blue can’t be absorbed so to us the sea looks blue.’

‘What’s a wave length?’

‘Hmm, I don’t think I’ll be able to explain it well enough. Your teacher would know, she’d be able to explain it far better.’

‘Right.’ Noel said and placed the oar down.

If it wasn’t night time or any time close, then why did the water look so dark? He felt that same muted hum, that same current, that same urge to follow it, to see wherever it led to. There were answers somewhere. Maybe deep down in the sea bed.

Noel gripped the sides of the boat, leaning precariously down, his knees on the wood of the seat.

‘Noel.’ Cid warned, the boat tilting.

‘Hold on, there’s something weird- ‘

A brisk gust of wind whisked the straw hat from his head and launched itself into the sky. It landed a few mere metres from them.

‘I-I can get it!’ Noel exclaimed diving into water, muffling any protests from Cid.

It was a simple task. Noel knew how to swim, in fact it was one of the first things he was taught when he arrived to the island. Yet some how no matter how much he paddled or kicked his legs to propel him upwards he just couldn’t. Fear hit him in a sudden pang. Seconds later he stopped thrashing. His lungs didn’t feel like ice. His legs didn’t ache. He felt fine physically.

That current, the soft humming, it wasn’t so low any more. It vibrated in his ears, tingled throughout his body from head to toe. He opened his eyes, blinking fast.

It felt like he was falling.

Noel could see the sunlight filtering through the water. It was warm, comfortable and with the current surrounding him, cosy. He reached out a hand as the water turned darker, he wondered what it would be like to touch to those rays of light. He didn’t want to leave it.

Through heavy lidded eyes he watched a hand grasp his own. It pulled him closer until it switched hold to around his torso. Determined limbs dragged them upwards to the surface.

Noel coughed and spluttered. He felt disoriented and the world spun as he struggled to ground himself.

‘Noel! Noel, focus on me.’ Cid’s panicked voice rung loud and clear above him.

He blinked wearily, Cid’s distressed face coming into view. He hated it. Noel unclenched his hands, only now aware of the vice like grip he had on Cid’s wet t-shirt.

‘I’m sorry,’ was all he could say before his eyes burned and tears filled his vision.

Arms hugged him fierce, pulling him close. Noel tried to reciprocate as much as he could through shaky limbs. A press of lips to the top of his head made him relax further into the embrace.

He tried to gather his thoughts to make some semblance of what happened, to tell Cid what had happened. It was no use, his thoughts were sludge, like the sand on a rainy day.

Slowly, Cid let go of him arms resting on his elbows. He combed the wet hair away from Noel’s eyes.

‘I think it’s time to head back.’  He said taking a breath.

Noel scrubbed at watery eyes and pulled himself up onto the wooden seat. He watched Cid gather his fishing equipment and hook in the oars. He rowed back in silence punctuated with the odd cough and Cid glancing at Noel whose eyes were glued out to the sea.

Close to the docks, Noel spoke up.

‘I can swim you know.’

‘I know.’ Cid said with a small smile.

‘Sorry I lost your hat.’

‘I know.’

Noel turned his head, lips red from being chewed.

‘Sorry I…scared away the fish.’

Cid stopped rowing as they reached the dock and pulled in an oar.

‘I think you scared me more than the fish.’ He said and used the remaining oar to tug the rowboat closer.

He leaned over and ruffled his damp hair as best as he could.

Noel took in a breath.

‘It was all weird down there, but I can’t- I don’t know-’ He began his voice scratchy.

Cid shook his head.

‘First let’s get out of this sun, get you checked over, a change of clothes and food. Then you can tell me. Deal?’

Noel sighed. He felt a little disappointed. There was no chance Cid was going to let him wander straight back out there without him knowing. He didn’t want to hurt Cid’s feelings either, knowing him he would go straight to his grandmother and tell her everything. Then he wouldn’t be able to stick one toe in the water without adult supervision.

Noel stuck his pinkie finger out.

‘Promise me you won’t tell granny about this. I know I was under for a long time but I don’t want to make her worry.’

‘So, it’s fine to make me worry?’ Cid said raising an eyebrow.

‘No! I- Ugh, Cid please?’ Noel whined.

Cid laughed and stuck out his own finger.

‘I won’t tell your grandmother and you’ll do as I say. Do we have an accord?’

‘Not everything you say.’ He mumbled, linking their fingers together and squeezing tight.

Cid tied up the boat to the dock, holding it steady while Noel crossed over. He held out his hand for Cid to hand him stuff to carry but he was given an odd look and chided to just relax. So, Noel rested his chin on the wooden pole as he waited for Cid to gather his things.

‘How long did you think you were down there for?’ Cid asked frowning.

Noel stretched, one arm coming to rest on his hip and the other his chin.

’20? 15 minutes? It felt like ages. I just kept falling.’

‘Strange.’

‘Huh? How long was I really under?’

Cid’s posture mimicked his own.

‘You were down there for barely under a minute.’

Noel wanted to argue that it made no sense. How could have Cid got to him so quickly when he sank so far down? He never saw Cid moving through the water to him. No one was there. He wasn’t even sure if he could call it drowning. Or maybe part of it was drowning and the rest, the falling?

It wasn’t scary at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A small adventure for answers.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading.  
> Feel free to point out any typos etc. it hasn't been betad.


End file.
